I have been dating  a guy and he is very nice to me . I like him a lot and i believe he likes me too. We spend a lot of time together and I am really becoming found of him, however I am still stuck on my ex and I can't seem to shake him out of my system. I sometimes find myself thinking about him when I should be thinking about the new guy. I know I should move on and let go but my ex is saying all the right things that i wanna hear. I don't have to question his feelings cause he lets me know how he feels about me and he is trying his hardest to show me he wants to make it work. As for the new guy he doesn't tell me his feelings or what he wants from our dating situation. But i figure he's  into  me because we see each other everyday and when we don't he does tell me he misses me.

My question is should I stick with the new guy even though I dont know what the future holds for us or what he really feels for me or should i go back with my ex and give him one more try? How long should I wait for a commitment from the new guy.. its only been 4 months but only 2 of them really count?

- Shaloni, 26 Houston, Texas

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The first thing you have to realize is that it's always hard to get over an ex.  Especially if you only broke up a short while ago.  The second thing is that if you really loved the person it almost never just ends abruptly unless someone did something very terrible.  The fact that he's trying so hard to get you back must mean that he did something wrong during the relationship to cause you to break up.  If what he did was something you couldn't forgive him for then you shouldn't even be considering getting back with him because it will probably happen again.  On the other hand, if you guys broke up for other reasons, then you might want to stop and think about what you really want.  You say he is saying all of the right things but is that just because he's trying to get you back?  Was he saying all the right things during the relationship to make you feel as special as he's making you feel now.  It's not enough for him to do these things just when he realizes what he's lost.     

Now the new relationshp seems very fresh so you can't begin to asess things from only ttwo months.  You have to communicate to him that you need to be spoken to in a certain way to feel that you're appreciated.  After explaining this to him see what the results are and take it from there.  Just make sure that you aren't allowing feelings for your ex to influence these negative thoughts about the new guy.  Sometimes we put things in our heads to try to make ourselves believe them in order to subconciously push ourselves in the other direction.  You have to make your decision based on what I've given you and not on what other people are feeding you.

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